May 2012
1 post
May 20th
April 2012
9 posts
Apr 30th
15 notes
1 tag
Apr 30th
1 tag
Apr 14th
522 notes
1 tag
Apr 14th
3,530 notes
1 tag
Apr 14th
841 notes
Apr 14th
119,519 notes
Apr 6th
Apr 5th
Apr 5th
February 2012
5 posts
3 tags
Feb 28th
Feb 20th
107,982 notes
Feb 20th
20,490 notes
Feb 10th
1 note
Feb 5th
23 notes
January 2012
4 posts
1 tag
Jan 26th
2,296 notes
That awkward when you already said "moment" in...
itotallyrelate: icanrelate.info 
Jan 17th
66,288 notes
Jan 17th
8,176 notes
Jan 17th
295 notes
December 2011
5 posts
6 tags
Ohh the references.
I love how this article about Siri made a Doctor Who reference.
Dec 9th
8 notes
Dec 4th
9,215 notes
1 tag
Shit.
I can’t believe I just said that. But it’s the truth. And it’s going to come back to haunt me. Regrets? Maybe. I can’t be in this house right now.
Dec 4th
6 notes
1 tag
I'm sorry.
I didn’t mean to lose touch. And I didn’t realize exactly how disconnected I am with the world until you brought it up. I want to fix this.
Dec 4th
7 notes
“I like to imagine that the world is one big machine. You know, machines never...”
– Brian Selznick - The Invention of Hugo Cabret (via vobot)
Dec 4th
29 notes
November 2011
19 posts
1 tag
Holy shit, I miss making videos.
As much as I love photography, I think I want to get back into making videos. Daniella inspired me to find my old youtube channel and I swear that I haven’t laughed this hard in awhile. I was so young, it’s crazy. I miss it.
Nov 29th
6 notes
Nov 26th
484 notes
Nov 25th
3,757 notes
Nov 25th
73 notes
Nov 24th
3,458 notes
4 tags
Nov 24th
29 notes
Nov 23rd
1,048 notes
2 tags
Nov 23rd
454 notes
Nov 22nd
244 notes
Nov 22nd
975 notes
7 tags
Nov 21st
25 notes
2 tags
Nov 21st
119 notes
5 tags
Nov 20th
2 tags
What I'm good at.
I have recently realized that there is something I’m quite good at. And that is…avoiding reality. Or at least, trying to find ways to avoid reality. I read. I watch television. I go on YouTube. I browse Netflix. Anything that can get my mind off my life and all the messed up shit of the day. I am just so good at taking my mind off the things I don’t want to think about. And...
Nov 20th
1 note
1 tag
Nov 20th
7,291 notes
5 tags
Nov 19th
2 tags
Nov 19th
Nov 13th
7,979 notes
5 tags
Babysitting Adventures
Me: What sound does a duck make?
4-year-old: [some pretty realistic sounding quacks]
Me: Alright, what about a tiger?
4-year-old: [rawr]
4-year-old: I don't know what sound a giraffe makes.
Me: Well what about a bunny rabbit?
4-year-old: Ehhhh, what's up doc? [carrot crunch]
Nov 8th
20 notes
October 2011
1 post
5 tags
Oct 10th
28 notes
September 2011
3 posts
1 tag
I just tried using Liam Neeson's speech from the...
Amazon Customer Service Rep: Sir, we're very sorry but your package won't ship until the 16th of September unless you upgrade your shipping.
Me: I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for overnight charges, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my package go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.
Amazon Customer Service Rep: I'm sorry sir, but you're going to have to talk to my sales manager.
Sep 14th
14,798 notes
6 tags
Sep 11th
1 tag
Sep 10th
190 notes
August 2011
1 post
7 tags
Aug 31st
July 2011
5 posts
6 tags
Jul 19th
3 notes
3 tags
When I grow up...
Me: Is that what you want to be when you grow up?
8-year-old: I wanna be a doctor when I grow up. 'Cause then I can write my kids doctor notes. And I can take care of them. And they don't have to go to the doctors, because I'm a doctor. I'll take care of all my family.
Me: Oh wow. What a sweet idea Nick, good for you.
8-year-old: And doctors make a lot of money.
Jul 12th